A cancer diagnosis, a stroke, a chronic health condition, progressive illness, or a life-changing accident can bring not only physical challenges but also profound emotional and psychological instability and difficulty.

Alongside the practical adjustments, people often experience grief for the life they once knew. There may be feelings of anger, fear, sadness, shame, or helplessness. Questions such as “Why me?” or “Will life ever be meaningful again?” are common. Psychotherapy can provide a space where these experiences are explored safely and compassionately.

From a Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) perspective, our thoughts, emotions, and behaviours are closely connected. Following a major illness or disability, it is understandable for the mind to become focused on solely the losses, limitations, and uncertainty. While these concerns are real and justifiable, CBT encourages us to examine whether our thinking has become overly focused on what cannot be controlled. By identifying unhelpful thought patterns and developing more balanced perspectives, individuals can begin to recognise strengths, opportunities, and sources of meaning that may still exist and unfold directly due to the new circumstance.

CBT does not ask people to deny hardship or “think positively” in a simplistic way. Instead, it helps people challenge catastrophic thinking, develop realistic coping strategies, and engage in behaviours that support wellbeing. Research has consistently shown CBT to be effective in helping people adjust to chronic illness, disability, and significant life changes.

Internal Family Systems (IFS) offers another valuable perspective. IFS suggests that we all contain different “parts” of ourselves. Following a life-changing diagnosis or injury, new parts may emerge. One part may feel frightened and vulnerable, another angry and resentful, while another may become highly protective and determined to remain in control. Afterall, it is human nature to like consistency and to an extent predictability to avoid existential anxiety.

At the same time, the parts that existed before the illness or disability do not disappear. The playful part, the caring part, the ambitious part, or the creative part may still be present, even if they now express themselves differently. IFS helps individuals build a compassionate relationship with all these parts, recognising that each is trying to help in its own way.

While few people would choose illness or disability, many discover unexpected resilience, wisdom, and depth through their journey. Psychotherapy cannot remove the reality of loss, but it can help people rebuild a meaningful relationship with themselves and create a life that remains rich, purposeful, and authentic despite the challenges they face. As someone who has had a physical disability since birth that is constantly challenging me, this way of thinking has helped me enormously personally.